Utah: Highway Robbery + Inquisition

January 31, 2003

Utah speeders beware - Utah proposal would use fines to fund police retirement

from Benefitnews.com

In a novel approach to funding retirement plans, Utah state legislators are considering a proposal that the state use a portion of fines resulting from certain traffic violations to bolster police officers' retirement benefits.

The measure, according to sponsoring state senator Mike Dmitrich (D), solves two problems. "It would help stop the speeding problem and help fund the retirement system."

The plan tacks a $20 surcharge on tickets for all moving violations, with the surplus revenue going to boost the annual cost-of-living increase for law enforcement retirees from 2.5% to 4%. The projected increase for state officers would be about $2 million; increases for local and county law enforcement have not yet been calculated, Dmitrich says.

The proposal is drawing criticism on several fronts. According to civil rights attorney Brian Bernard, "If nothing else, such a law creates an appearance of conflict and would serve to undermine the image and integrity of law enforcement."

The Machine congratulates the Utah legislator for creating a novel combination of legitimized highway robbery and Inquisition financial practices.

The Inquisitors and their legitimizing priest-buddies were paid by selling off the assets of the individuals they accused of being witches. If they didn't like you, the'd call you a witch, throw you in jail, sell off all your property, and keep the money. You couldn't have an attorney because if you lost they'd have to kill him too for the crime of defending a witch. And no one else could have the money because it was tainted and only Inquisitors were pure enough to withstand its evil influence.

Highway robbery, of course, has always been an economic niche. Thank goodness that our governments fiercely reserve that privelege to themselves! They should at least try to pretend that it's all in our best interest.

Welcome to the machine.